ABC's of ME-Part 2

ABC’s of ME

Part 2

Ice Cream

I don’t know what it is about ice cream, but it brings me a little summer anytime, anywhere.  Mint chocolate chip is my favorite.  On a sugar cone.  In case anyone was wondering. 

Juggling

I used to be fascinated with learning how to juggle.  It just looked like a cool thing to do, and I was always up for a challenge.  I started with napkins, since they were a little easier to catch, and they floated down so very gently and slowly.  Once I mastered juggling napkins, I moved on to tennis balls.  I never really got further than that.  I can’t even say that I actually mastered juggling tennis balls, but now I juggle something a little different.  I juggle tasks, events, schedules.  With two busy kids, you have to learn how to juggle activities, and other priorities that I find important.  For example, homemade meals together and actual conversations.  I juggle a little more carefully now, since the stakes are a little higher than some fluttering napkins.

Kit Kat

Favorite chocolate.  It’s crunchy. It’s sweet.  It comes in a pair, if you feel like sharing.  I never seem to though.

Logophile

Someone who loves words is called a logophile.  I have a notebook of words that I have collected.  Words that have powerful meanings.  Or words with cool sounds and pronunciations.  My favorite words currently are shenanigans and atrocious.  They are fun to say, and when you say it with a little extra oomph, it just makes you feel happy. 

Movies

I love them! I love them! I love them!  If you ask me what I feel like doing for the evening, it is possible that I will say, watch movie.  Movies inspired by true events are probably my favorites.  Followed very closely by romantic, undying love type of movies.  It really is hard for me to pick a favorite movie.  There are so many I love for so many different reasons.  I have my go to movie if I feel like a good cry, and I have ones I go to if I need a pep talk.  My sister and cousin, and now my children even, play a game in which you have to guess the movie based on the movie quotes someone else gives.  It’s quite fun on road trips!

Nostalgic

Some of my favorite trips are down memory lane.  I don’t mean to dwell in the past, but sometimes a smell or a song will take me back in time.  To a simpler day, or a perfect moment that is forever chiseled in my memory.  I don’t stay there long.  Just a short visit, but it warms me up all over.

Optimistic

“Be optimistic,

Don’t you be a grumpy.

When the road gets bumpy,

Just smile, smile, smile and be happy.”

As you have learned, I love movies.  There is a little song from the movie, Anywhere but Here, that always seems to come into my head when I am not having the best moment.  It is about a single mother who is doing the very best she can for her daughter.  Unfortunately, her daughter does not agree with the way the mother tries to get ahead.  When things went wrong, and they often did for the duo, she sang the song above.    It doesn’t necessarily change their luck, just like it doesn’t change my circumstances, but it does definitely make the tough moments a little easier to swallow.

Prayer

Prayer has always been in my life since I was young enough to remember.  There are pictures of my grandma and me walking around her house saying our prayers before bed.  I was in diapers.  I 100% believe in the power of prayer.  I don’t always take advantage of its benefits.  Sometimes I wake up and get to running before I even cover myself with protection and blessings.  Lucky for me, I remember, and get to praying. 

Quotes

 “A good quote is a beautiful bird! Wherever you meet with it, you will start flying with it!”

― Mehmet Murat ildan

Sophia Itzel Lara

She likes to say that she was probably doing pirouettes in my belly or toe touches.  That must have been what I felt when something was kicking in my belly.  I was overcome with emotion when they placed my green eyed girl in my arms for the first time, and I still feel that same way when I see that girl smile.  She has the sweetest heart, and I will do everything I possibly can to keep her that way.  I might have to lock her up in a tower or something.

~Esmeralda  

Embracing the "Weird"

It was the end of a busy day, at the end of a long week, and I was looking forward to relaxing completely with my little family!  We filed into our favorite row at the movie theater, and got situated passing out cups of popcorn.  Once everyone had what they needed, I headed to the bathroom, with my daughter in tow, to change out of my heels and into something more comfortable. 

As I am finishing up, I let out sigh of relief but stop mid breath.

“Sophia, do you think people will think I am weird because I walked in wearing a dress, and now I am wearing shorts and a tee shirt?”

Using her vast experience, and 8 years of wisdom she comments, “Maybe mommy, but who cares?  Everyone is a little weird in their own way.”

I feel a little silly after her comment.  I am the mother.  It is my job to teach and model to my daughter the truly important things in life.  Being kind.  Respecting other people.  Keeping your word.  Showing integrity.  I want her to be a strong, loving woman who is sure about herself and her worth.  I want her to feel confident in whom she is as a person.  Not because of what she wears on the outside or what others think of her. 

I remember being that sure of myself once.  I wasn’t worried about how I was perceived by others because it never crossed my mind that someone might think something negative about me.  It just wasn’t on the radar.  I wondered to myself how I got this way. How I allowed the opinions of others to make me question myself.  People will always have an opinion about what I do or how I do it, whether positive or negative, its still there.  Looming over like a gray cloud.  The trick is to know you.  To pull out the umbrella of truth, and let the comments or messages not soak you and leave you cold.   Instead, play in the puddles of criticism, and show others how fun it can be.

In the little bathroom stall, as I am placing my clothes back into my pink and black bag, I am proud of my little wise young lady.  I know society, and outside influences will already be speaking messages of inadequacy, as my girl gets older.  I want to model a different message.  I want to show her that it is ok to be who you are, because everyone is unique and special, and as she so eloquently put it, a little weird in his or her own way. 

           

I walk out and I embrace my little bundle of uniqueness.  I look up to her, while I look down at her smile.  And we walk out, hand in hand, confident and secure. 

~Esmer

Enough

 She exhales it like the rest of us exhale carbon dioxide.  She breathes it out to the world.  Offering it through her smiles, her kind words, her sweet gestures.  It's so natural for her this thing called love.  She sees the best in people, and only chooses to believe the sun shines even when she can't feel it on her carmel colored face. The day she was born and they handed her to me, I cried. One tiny tear, for the precious gift I knew I held tightly in my arms.  When she opened her emerald eyes in my direction, my breath caught, and I prayed.  I said a prayer of thanksgiving, but also one of guidance.  I was going to need God's help, I knew, to raise this tiny princess.  7 years later, I pray harder for my tender-hearted beauty.  

One day this past year, she was unusally quiet on the drive home.  Very out of character for my chatty daughter, especailly after a full day of first grade.  I noticed her gripping something very tightly in her hand, but I decided to wait it out and give her a chance to talk to me when she was ready.  Sure enough before we got home she began to open up.  What I heard broke my heart for my little girl.  She explained that she had no one to sit with at lunch because her best friends were mad at her.  Her little heart had developed a crush on a very sweet little boy, and they had become very good friends.  Problem was her friends wanted her to sit with them at lunch and play with them at recess, but so did this little boy.  She didn't know what to do, she told me through tears, and both parties ended up mad at her.  What she held so dearly in her hand was a letter to this little boy who was special to her, asking him to please not be mad at her. Apologizing over and over again throughout the letter. It took every ounce of energy to not let my past experiences affect what I said to my vulnerable daugther.  So I took a moment, and prayed. 

We talked about how she had done nothing wrong and did not need to apologize.  We discussed that being in the middle of a situation like this wasn't easy and it wasn't fun, but it also wasn't going to be the last time it would happen.  She understood that it was okay to be her, and any decision she made would be okay because she cared about all of her friends. The next day she came home, like herself.  Chatty, happy, and relaxed.  She talked with her friends, including the little boy, and shared how she had felt.  They communicated better than some adults based on her version of events, and decided to all sit together and play together.  No separation needed.  Joy ruled our car ride home again.  Crisis averted.  First of many I am sure.  

Yes, I still pray for my daughter.  And I will continue to pray for her.  I pray that the world doesn't harden her heart.  I pray that she always sees the good in people even when its buried deep down inside them and it's

hard to notice.  Mostly I pray that she will know her worth and how valuable she is.  That she doesn't have to apologize for being who she is or what she feels.  I pray that she will love regardless of what anyone else says or does.  Because she is so special.  So loved.  And so valuable.

-Esmer